Embracing my hair is part of a personal acceptance journey. Looking at myself in the mirror is to me an act of love, I am facing myself and love the woman I am becoming. Being able to take care of my hair myself is also something that helped me in my journey. It has impacted me positively over time.
I moved to England in 2014, and this moment of my life really shaped the way I perceive my hair and myself today. I was gobsmacked by the incredible diversity in this country, how proud people -especially women- are of their roots, their features and how strong their cultural points of reference are. This mindset is very different from Martinique where importance is given to a sleek appearance and big curly hair isn’t seen as something that can tick this box. The more European you look the better.
I remember people calling me crazy when they could notice my hair not being perfectly flattened on my head - this took a toll on my self-confidence and nurtured this impression of feeling different.
I really suffered from the comments heard on a day to day basis about my hair: ‘ugly’ and ‘coarse’ where the most common ones. Thankfully, my mother kept repeating me that the hair given to us is simply what’s fits us best! How can it be on us if it’s not for us? This is something I tried to remember every single day, especially when witnessing the massive weave and wig trend that took over the island at some point.
Trends come and go as much as our self-esteem can. It’s important to accept what we naturally have instead of trying to dissimulate it and paying too much attention to what the standards are. Love yourself, the rest will simply follow.